With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
