he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip