Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
