I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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