Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Randomize
