DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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