We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Randomize
