I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
