That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
