Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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