They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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