If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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