theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
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