I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Randomize