Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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