yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Randomize