yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Randomize
