He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize