You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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