my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
zippers are such a cool invention
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize