So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
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Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
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still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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