she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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