I need help removing her.
I cockslap morals
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize