It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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