fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
