This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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