uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
Randomize