I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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