Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Randomize