I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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