You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
foreskin is a definite game changer
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Who died my cat blue again?
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
