38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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