I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
