its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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