i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
it's like iHOP with fire
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
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