haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
you will always have a special place in my vag
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
