Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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