help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
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