just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
