Why are handjobs necessary in class?
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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