I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize