I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
