Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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