Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
These 23 People Had Crazy Sex With Complete Strangers
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
23 Medical Examiners Reveal The Most Disturbing Causes Of Death They’ve Seen
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.