Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
It all started with a game of naked twister.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
