you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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