i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
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after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
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You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
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