SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
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