Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
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