The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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